H-BRS news: The psychology of gift-giving: "We create a social network with gifts"

H-BRS: According to forecasts, Germans will spend around 120 billion euros in the retail sector this Christmas. What significance does the purchase price of a gift have - from the point of view of the recipient and the giver?

Britta Krahn: First of all, such sales information emphasises the great importance of gift-giving in general, regardless of the price. We know from various studies that an expensive gift is not rated any better than an inexpensive one. The happiness of the study participants did not change significantly. What mattered, however, was the extent to which the individual interests and wishes of the recipient were taken into account, i.e. the care taken when selecting the gift.
A very valuable gift can even seriously upset the fragile balance of social relationships and create a debt that the recipient must first pay off. Gifts then become means of power, demonstrate prestige or make social hierarchies visible. On the other hand, we know from recent studies that smaller gifts are very well suited to consolidating and strengthening our relationships. This is successful if the gift suits the recipient on the one hand, but also says something about the giver on the other. So more important than the value of the gift is that the person receiving it is really happy about it.

H-BRS: In the run-up to Christmas, the sale of toys and books in particular is booming. However, the most common gifts in Germany are vouchers or gifts of money. Yet gifts of money tend to have a bad reputation, as there is a suspicion that the giver has wanted to save themselves the trouble of making an individual choice?

Krahn: The important thing is that the gift expresses appreciation. This can certainly be a carefully wrapped gift of money or a voucher for a long-cherished wish or a book if the gift shows that the giver has thought about the person receiving the gift.
In addition, gifts of money and gift vouchers give the recipient the flexibility and freedom to choose something they really like or need. This does not necessarily have to please the giver - perhaps quite the opposite. In this sense, giving a gift is first and foremost an investment of time and attention.

Giving fulfils a timeless social function

H-BRS: Is gift-giving still in keeping with the times? Everyone is familiar with the idea that everything has to be worthwhile somehow.

Krahn: Yes, it may often be a motive to perceive an action or commitment as worthwhile. But this only applies to giving gifts to a limited extent if we take a differentiated view of the gift of a person giving something of themselves. If we take a look at cultural history, we find that gift-giving is one of the few universal interpersonal behaviours in all cultures. We give gifts in order to establish, maintain and deepen relationships. In this respect, giving strengthens our social interaction, conveys a sense of belonging and strengthens bonds. Seen in this light, gift-giving fulfils an important timeless social function. With gifts and counter-gifts as a symbol and manifestation of our relationships, we weave a web around us over time.